Saturday, September 13, 2008

The 10 Definitions of What Every Woman Wants

Written by L. Jermiane Copyright 2007 through 2008

1. Touch Without Motive: This is when you can simply touch your woman with no hidden intention, and nothing sexual as the motive. When you can walk up behind your woman and gently massage her shoulders while you place a soft kiss upon her cheek right before you whisper "Good morning". That in itself will cause that woman to want, need, and desire you in a way that only "sexual" touching cannot. We as men have to learn how to hold, caress, and comfort our women with the strength of our arms and warmth of our masculinity. Your woman should be able to simply lie with and/or under you without being mauled 5 minutes later. Emotional touch yields far better results than sexual touch alone.

2. Attention Without Obligation: Attention without obligation is the most simple to form as habit out of all the definitions I present. Basically it means to be attentive to your woman without feeling that you have to be. Men tend to show affection and/or some form of attention after a heated discussion has taken place as to why he doesn't already. This will last until the effects of the discussion wear off, and then he's back to his normal way of response. It is in a man's nature to show real attention to and passion for those things which are most important to him. We pay attention our favorite sports although we have no obligation to the team, yet we can't pay that same degree of attention to our women just because they deserve it? I question why that is.

3. A Safe Place Without Worry: Our culture has produced women who have become strong, independent, self-sufficient, and very well capable of handling their own business and taking care of themselves, without a man to do so for her. Times have definitely changed over the past 50 years and the June Cleavers of the world are a dying breed, although they still exist, and I respectfully commend the homemakers. I say all of that to say that still, no matter how self sufficient and/or successful, every woman desires to have someone there, that she has enough trust invested in, that she can run to and find escape from the stresses of her day to day life. A quiet and serene atmosphere, equipped with dinner, a bubble bath, and a peaceful night's sleep in your arms is sometimes all that woman needs to feel safe, and without fear, anxiety, or worry.

4. A Point of "Weakness" Without Concern: Women are the strongest of all of God's creations, and we know this, rather we admit to it or not. The feminine nature has a tolerance for pain that far surpasses any level that a man can imagine. This strength is not always present in the physical sense of build and/or muscle mass. This strength is more prevalent in a woman's capabilities physically and emotionally. From child birth, to monthly menstruation, to dealing with heartache, single motherhood, and so many other things that women tend to face more often than the average man does. With that in mind, commend your woman on being strong but also be strong enough to be her point of weakness when she needs you to be. All it takes is you being there, and her knowing that no matter what she may face and/or have to be concerned with, she has a man she can run to, let her guards down with, release her weary soul into, and find refreshment with. Women thirst for men who are strong enough to handle and take care of her when she feels the need to be weak, looked after, and cared for a little more than the normal amount of "caring" on any given day.

5. Prayer Without Ceasing: I believe that a woman admires and esteems a man who knows how to pray over her, and their family if they share one together. This is neither a question of religion nor a question of the god that you may serve. This simply means that you should know how to go before the Lord in prayer for your woman and family. To simply lay your hands upon your woman's head, right before she wakes and right after she lies down to sleep, and say a soft prayer is an amazing feeling for that woman to experience. Some women have never experienced it, and therefore they won't understand this point. But there is truth to it, and once it is experienced her love for you will blossom immensely. And just a side note; for a woman to see you lay your hands upon the head of a child who was fathered by another man, who may or may not be in the picture, is a most beautiful sight to behold. For that, she will fall even deeper for you. For you to take the accountability upon yourself, before God, for a child that's not yours by the standpoint of blood, will soften that woman's heart for you to degrees I cannot even comprehend. I just know it to be true.

6. Compassion Without Question: A woman should never have to question rather or not her man has compassion for her. Compassion is not love, compassion is not "deep sex", and compassion is not sacrificial. Now compassion does involve love because it is birthed from it, but it goes beyond love, not to say that it's stronger, it's just different from it. Deep, slow, melodic sex has nothing to do with compassion, although compassion can lead you to that. Sacrifice is with reason, compassion must come without it. Compassion is a man's ability to cry with and for his woman when she's hurting. Compassion is noticing that your woman is hurting without her even telling you. Compassion is the two of you sharing such an emotional connection that God himself speaks to you concerning her well being. Compassion is having a heart that feels your woman's heart rather close or from a distance. Compassion is when you can feel that woman in your very soul, and the feeling causes you to cry because of the depth in which you understand her, and thus understand yourself.

7. Passion, Foreplay, and MorePlay: Most women, not all, require more than the act of sex to be completely satisfied. The act of sex can be a beautiful experience rather intense or soft, extreme or normal, fast or with a slower pace. The atmosphere and acts surrounding the actual intercourse mean so much more than the intercourse itself. My own personal definition of intercourse is the act if entering into a course of pleasure that will ultimately blow that woman's very mind, each and every time. When you involve passion, foreplay, and moreplay the act of sex becomes addictive to a point that she will crave you, desire you, want you, need you, and chase that ultimate high every time that she is with you. And it is your responsibility as a man to supply that high and so many others every time she shares her body with you. When a woman has sex with you she allows you to enter into her, and that in itself is a privilege that we as men take for granted. Just think about it for a moment; a woman is allowing you to enter into her. That indeed is amazing to me. Therefore you have to be passionate with and attentive to her body, utilize the elements of foreplay and stimulating all of her senses. Moreplay is simple; take her beyond your orgasm. It's selfless and not selfish. Meaning, do not let the scene conclude just because you have an orgasm. Take her further and allow her the pleasure and opportunity of sweet surrender to those sexual things unfamiliar.

8. For You To Just Listen: This is self explanatory, and so easy to accomplish yet we as men tend to have a problem mastering this act. Sometimes all your woman wants is for you to listen. Give her your ear, undivided attention, and patience as she talks with you about anything from how her day went to where she feels she is going as a woman, to where she sees your relationship headed. If more men took the time to listen to our women, we would better understand them, value them, esteem them, and our women would be much happier than they are. All it takes is you listening to her, responding when you need to or not at all if she doesn't need you to. It is possible to listen without response, and sometimes that works best. Sometimes all she needs to do is vent, so let her.

9. Responsibility Without Conflict: This one is age-old and most needed in today's relationships. Men, and I use the term loosely with this definition, have become lazy and we have become more caught up in hip hop fantasies, and video games than we are in being a responsible, hard working, and mature man. Men lack responsibility from the simplest things like taking out the trash, cutting the grass, and washing the dishes, to the more serious issues such as providing financial stability, emotional security, and taking care of your children rather you are with that woman or not. What happened to us, as men? And where have all the real men disappeared to? The men who know how and when to be aggressive. The men who know when it's time to compromise and when it's time to be immovable. The men who know how to be soft, sensitive, and attentive, but they also know how to take charge, and take care of home. Why is there a conflict between men and women when a woman questions our lack of real responsibility?

10. Love, Without Condition: Love without condition is the most powerful form of love there is. In today's society we use the word love too loosely, and we don't really mean it when we say it. Love without condition is the hardest form to master because human nature tells us to hold grudges, be unforgiving, cheat when not satisfied, and be all for self. There is no greater feeling to experience, but there is no harder emotion to develop. We tend to be too cynical and judgmental at times to develop this form of love. Love without condition overpowers our very nature in the fact that you will die for that person if you have to, and you will live for that person because you want to.


  1. Truth, truth, truth, truth, truth....

    so much truth!

  2. ok, so why am i about to steal that and place it in a facebook note!. Truth indeed..first time here..making my blog rounds! added ya lovely :)


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